How Embarrassing

I got the urge to clean out closets this week.  I don't know why, but it seemed like a good idea.  We don't have a lot of closet or storage space to begin with, and I realized that the space we do have is filled with who-knows-what.  So I decided to tackle the guest bedroom closet which is full of papers, files, boxes, books, and anything else I can't stash somewhere else.  It's a disaster, and I cringe everytime I open the closet door.

This little task turned into a multiple day project, interrupted by a two-day conference, so we have piles of papers, file folders and junk all over the house - the dining room table, the kitchen counter, the dresser in my room, the mantle in the living room - plus a scattered assortment of stuff to take to Goodwill.  On Monday, I decided that if I was going to do this job, I'd do it right.  That meant dealing with every file and every piece of paper, once and for all.  But I didn't anticipate that it would be an unfinished project when I left for the conference on Thursday morning.  Ugh.

So last night, after the girls were in bed, I decided to finish my project.  I grabbed a big pile of file folders from the mantle, sat down in front of the television, and started sorting.  About halfway through the pile, as I was moving a folder, I looked down to see a folded green document mixed in with a few other papers, between file folders. 

My first thought was, "You've got to be kidding me." 

My next fleeting thought was, "I am such an idiot!!!  I looked everywhere for that."

The very next thought was, "God knew it all along.  He's in control of this too."

That folded green document was my birth certificate.  The one I couldn't find in March so I had to order it from the State Department.  The one that I waited three months to receive.  The one that held up our home study and filing the I-600a.  THAT birth certificate. 

And I apparently had it in my possession all along.  Argh!!

Thankfully, my husband was very gracious about it when I told him what I found.  He wasn't mad or irritated (which is probably how I would have felt if the shoe was on the other foot...)  He just reminded me that God knows the child He has for us. 

I'm not TOO upset about my find because I recognize that the Lord has been working in me though this adoption process, especially in the wait for my birth certificate.  But I confess I am a little embarrassed.